i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
