I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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