guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
