i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Randomize
