Do you still have your period?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
