SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Panties = found
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
