So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
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