one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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