Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
