i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
