what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
