I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize