belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
420 ftw
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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