If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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