She's JV to your varsity
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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