I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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