Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
