you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
