Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
