I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
