Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
