just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
