I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
