Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
