What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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