Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
