Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I look excited, but its just a facade.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
