He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
