how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
