Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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