Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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