I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize