Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Come see our sink grown plant.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Randomize
