I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
