i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
