I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
