So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize