During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
