the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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