3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
