can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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