He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
