This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize