its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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