it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
