she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
