Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
