i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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