I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
