their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
