it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just pynch a tree in the face
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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