i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
